Holding successful feedback conversations with ease (even virtually)

Feedback conversations are one of the most effective tools for employee management. They offer employees and managers the chance to reflect on the working relationship so far and set important impulses for the shared future.

All the more astonishing is that only few companies fully exploit the potential of the open exchange with their employees in everyday work.

In some places, feedback conversations are almost neglectfully squeezed into the agenda as a pure obligatory exercise, so there's hardly any room for substantive depth. Elsewhere, they resemble a hail of criticism with which neither party really feels comfortable. Assuming, of course, that feedback conversations take place in a company at all – which isn't a given.

In this article, we show you why none of these negative examples is effective and what added value feedback conversations can have for you. In addition, you'll learn how to optimally shape the exchange with your employees and thus ensure a better working atmosphere.

What actually is a feedback conversation?

The success of a feedback conversation stands or falls with the right definition. It isn't a mere meeting with an employee in which questions around daily tasks are clarified. Nor is it a tough negotiation in which only one side leaves the room as the supposed winner.

Instead, a feedback conversation is a confidential dialogue between an employee and their manager, in which…

• The collaboration so far is summarized and evaluated;
• Both parties have the chance to speak openly about possible criticisms, suggestions, problems and wishes;
• New goals are defined.

In other words: a feedback conversation delivers valuable quality time both to you as a leader and to your employees.

Yes, you read that right. Quality time. Just as we spend it with our loved ones from family and friends, it's also essential between employer and employee. After all, it's a relationship, even if a professional one.

Accordingly important are feedback conversations when it comes to meeting on equal footing and addressing topics that often get lost in the hustle of everyday life.

Even if it sounds absurd at first. Feedback conversations deliver valuable quality time.

What's the point of feedback conversations?

A skeptical reaction to this could be: „But I talk with my employees every day and my door is always open. Why put in even more time?“

The answer to this objection is as simple as it is significant: because feedback conversations give your employee communication a special framework.
 

• Praise and feedback aren't handed out in passing, but can be discussed in a protected space.
• Through the official character, you and your employees have the chance to explicitly prepare for an exchange with each other beforehand.
• Both sides can give each other full attention, free of other influences.

This starting situation is not only ideal ground for important topics to be addressed that make micromanagement easier for you as a leader.

In addition, such a conversation means great appreciation for the employee. After all, as a manager you take time to speak exclusively about their concerns.

When done right, feedback conversations can thus…
 

• Form the basis for a functioning and effective collaboration.
• Strengthen the trust between employees and leaders.
• Give both sides important feedback and orientation about their performance.
• Help your employees better unfold their abilities and potential and develop further.
• Uncover and eliminate possible triggers for frustration, dissatisfaction or conflict.
• Increase the job satisfaction and motivation of employees.

4 tips on how you can successfully hold feedback conversations.

The question of when a feedback conversation is successful is very individual for every company. Depending on the starting point, concrete goals can be tied to it, like discussing a salary increase. But maybe it's just about regular personal contact with your employees.

In any case, you recognize a good feedback conversation by the fact that both parties part afterward with a positive feeling. As a manager, you can contribute quite a bit to this if you take the following best practices to heart:

1. Establish feedback conversations as a fixed routine in the company

Put yourself in your employees' shoes for a moment. Imagine you'd already been working at the company for five years and suddenly receive an invitation from your boss to a feedback conversation. What would go through your mind?

The range of possible thoughts goes from „Oh no, am I being fired?“ to „Is this a joke? Only now?“.

You probably already sense what we're getting at. Irregular or too infrequent feedback conversations tend to achieve the opposite of what they're actually supposed to.

So that your company and your employees can benefit from the positive effects, feedback conversations should take place from the start and at set intervals. Once per calendar year is only a minimum that you may gladly exceed.

Extra tip: plan enough time for each employee and switch off possible sources of disruption like the phone or computer.

2. No false shyness toward your employees

Open and honest feedback doesn't always bring nothing but sunshine.

Addressing another person about negative impressions or even formulating criticism isn't always easy. After all, it always comes with the worry of saying something wrong, annoying the other side or even worsening the working relationship. The not-very-flattering analogy of a piñata game in a minefield almost suggests itself.

Against this backdrop, it seems hardly surprising when managers try to avoid feedback conversations as much as possible. Or when they hold them only superficially to fulfill their duty and dodge conflicts. Avoid these mistakes, with which you deny yourself one of the most efficient tools of your employee management.

Instead of fearing disputes, you should rather focus on the many opportunities such an exchange with your employees can bring. On top of that, with deliberate conversation management and empathetic communication, you can significantly reduce the risk of conflicts with employees.

3. Reaching the goal with the right structure

There are various approaches for the right structuring of feedback conversations. We advise you to divide the conversation into four phases:
 

• An evaluation of the current state of the working relationship;
• Mutual feedback, in which the respective strengths and weaknesses are discussed;
• The discussion of the personal development of the employee in the company as well as discussing possible training measures;
• Setting goals for the near or distant future.

With such a structuring, you ensure that you optimally use the valuable time with your employees and can address all relevant points.

4. Communicate feedback constructively

As the name already suggests, feedback takes on a special significance in the feedback conversation. It gives both sides important insights into how they're perceived by the other.

So that this mutual assessment turns out positive and not hurtful, you should observe a few basic rules:
 

• Never formulate possible criticism in an attacking way, but constructively and well-meaningly. Your counterpart should get the feeling that you want to actively support them in their development.
• Check your own body language. Nervously bouncing legs, crossed arms and missing eye contact hardly contribute to a pleasant atmosphere.
• With negative feedback from your employee, resist possible inner impulses to justify yourself. Instead, accept their assessment as important information about how your employees perceive you and your leadership style.
• Respond empathetically to your conversation partner and take their feedback seriously. Consider their individual situation in the company and put yourself in their shoes to understand them better.
• Pay attention to a protected and trusting atmosphere in which both sides can speak freely with each other. Make the employee aware that what's said doesn't leave the room and won't be used against them.

Holding virtual feedback conversations – on togetherness in front of the screen camera.

Holding feedback conversations virtually isn't always easy. With a few basic rules, it gets easier.

Increasing digitalization doesn't stop at feedback conversations either. The reason for that isn't only the unofficial unword of the year 2020 (small hint: it starts with the letter „C“).

Even before the past year, terms like New Work, working world 4.0 and agile transformation took on new dimensions. More and more companies rely on modern structures, location-independent workplaces and virtual teams.

This progress, however, also brings challenges. Like, for example, holding feedback conversations with employees who sit kilometers away or whom you may never have even met in real life. The most common solution for this is video calls.

Even if these resemble a personal conversation in their course and the discussed content, a conversation via camera nevertheless creates a different atmosphere. The mind perceives the distance and body language, as an important indicator of the counterpart's stance, falls away almost completely.

The more you manage, despite these limitations, to build closeness and trust with your conversation partner, the more effective the feedback conversation runs too. Possible means for this are:

• Eye contact – Make sure that when speaking, you look as much as possible into the camera or at least at the screen. Letting your eyes wander around the room amounts to a lack of eye contact.
• Address – Use inclusive language as much as possible. That means words like „we, us, jointly, together“ should be used frequently to express belonging and build trust.
• Focus – Disruptions are almost even more annoying in video calls than in a personal conversation. A stable internet connection and a quiet environment are an important prerequisite.
• Empathy – Concentrate exactly on what you say and try to compensate for the limitations caused by the distance. Emotions, thoughts and also uncertainties may be addressed even more strongly.

Holding feedback conversations.

In summary, it can be stated: the success of feedback conversations depends on various factors you can directly influence as a leader.

If you manage to respond to your counterpart empathetically, in a structured and constructive way, positive effects set in for your employees as well as your company. That's exactly what makes feedback conversations so valuable – they're a win for both sides.